Determining Gender Roles!

-The Culture Is Broken!

Our culture is broken! Have you noticed that? It’s broken because it’s made up of broken people who are born into this world totally depraved & separated from God because of their sin! Only the Gospel of Christ can adequately & accurately direct us to solutions that restore our homes & our communities! Our broken culture can’t help us! When determining our roles, as men & women, God’s Word must shape our opinions, not the culture!

-The Original Design!

God’s original design, at Creation, can be found in Genesis, the book of beginnings! After creating Adam, “…the Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper as his complement.’” Genesis 2:18.  So, God designed the woman to “COMPLEMENT” the man; not, “COMPLIMENT”— “Why, Adam, what a handsome, rugged man you are”—but, to “COMPLEMENT” or “COMPLETE” him. Yes! That means that the man was NOT complete by himself! Eve was his “completer”; and, by implication, she was also made complete by Adam! Adam & Eve, man & woman, were created and designed, by God, to “complement” and “complete” one another… NOT, to COMPETE!

-Happiness & Fulfillment Realized!

The way that men & women find genuine happiness & fulfillment is in owning the identity given to them by God, their designer! The culture is WRONG! Ladies:  You will not find meaning, in your life, by becoming more manly & aggressive! And, men:  you will not find meaning, in your life, by becoming more passive, effeminate & unsure of yourself! And, for the same reason we needed to shed the ethnic jokes, we need to quit making fun of those who’ve become so twisted, in their logic, that they think the answer is in self-mutilation—removing the sexual organs they were created with; and, adding sexual prosthetic organs!

-Anger With Their Creator!

How sad! Their gripe is ultimately with their Creator! They’ve fallen into the same trap as Adam & Eve, in the garden, when the tempter convinced them that life would be so much better if they could be their own god! Somehow, he convinced them that an ALL-WISE God didn’t know what He was doing when He created them! So, how’s that working out? Not very well for the human race! We’ve never been more confused!

-God, Help Us Love The Broken!

The Apostle Paul asks, “But who are you, a mere man, to talk back to God? Will what is formed say to the One who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” Romans  9:20. And, yet, that’s exactly what we do when we fight God on the way He designed us! If you’re a follower of Jesus, let me challenge you to love the broken world of people we’re surrounded by! Jesus wept over people! He saw them as sheep without a Shepherd! We won’t win the culture wars by arguing & shouting down those who disagree with us on this issue! We won’t win with our rants on Facebook or Twitter or the blogosphere! When we’re quoting 1 Peter 3:15, “…always be ready to give a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason  for the hope that is in you…” don’t forget the rest of it:  “…however, do so with gentleness & respect…”

 

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When Good Sex Goes Bad!

-When It Happens Outside Marriage!

According to God—who, by the way, CREATED sex—healthy sex only happens in a marriage between a man & a woman! The Word of God warns us against the ramifications of sexual conduct outside the safety of marriage between a man and a woman! All other sexual activities are spiritually unhealthy because it’s disobedience to God and His Word. But, it can also prove to be physically and emotionally unhealthy! And, the effects tend to have a trickle down effect. It can negatively impact your family & your children downline.

-Messing Up People’s Lives!

When your sex life doesn’t comply with Scripture, you can mess up a lot of people’s lives! One more consideration for those of you who think you’ve already messed up too badly! That you’re hopeless! Maybe you grew up in a worldly environment & were never even taught these Biblical truths. Or, maybe you grew up hearing them; but, you thought you were smart enough to beat “the system”; so, you played around with sex & you’re paying the price for it now! Well, thanks to Jesus’ work on the cross, you’re not beyond repair!

-Good News For Those Who Messed Up!

The Gospel is good news to every sinner, regardless the sin! We have a God who makes beauty from ashes! There is forgiveness & restoration through the cross! So, don’t hide behind your sin any longer! Confess it so you can be healed (James 5:16). And, from this day forward, plant your feet on the firm foundation of God’s Word, when it comes to your sex life! God’s Word alone provides us the only flawless counsel for building healthy marriages. In the book of 1 Corinthians, the Apostle Paul shares several points, about sexuality, as God directs us:  “It is good for a man not to have relations with a woman. But because sexual immorality is so common, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband….I say the following as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all people were just like me. But each has his own gift from God, one person in this way and another in that way. I say to the unmarried and to widows: It is good for them if they remain as I am” 1 Corinthians 7:1, 6-8.

-Is Celibacy A Gift?

What Paul is encouraging here is “celibacy.” He seems to indicate that “celibacy” is God’s gift for some individuals! So, if you can’t imagine being celibate, that probably means that you don’t have that gift! I purposely used the word celibacy, instead of “singleness”—because celibacy more accurately defines what Paul is describing here—celibacy is abstaining from ALL sexual relations! Whereas, in our culture, “singleness” is often preferred because there are no sexual attachments or boundaries—it’s “Sex In The City!” It’s friends with “benefits.” So, being “single” doesn’t necessarily express what Paul is thinking! When he says, “It is good for a man not to have relations with a woman” (v.1) he’s using it as a euphemism for “sexual intercourse”; and, the context of v.2 bears that out. So, celibacy can be a good & honorable gift from God!

 

What Sexual Health Looks Like!

-It’s Not What You Think!

Unfortunately, marriage & parenting are the butt of a lot of jokes in our society. We sing a lot of sad songs about lost love; and, it seems that’s one way we manage the pain.  Like the story of a woman whose husband lay in bed dying, going in and out of a coma. One day he briefly awoke & reached out to his wife to draw her close.  As she sat next to him, he began to whisper some of his remembrances to her:  “Honey, you’ve been right there beside me through all the rough times.  You were there when I got fired. You were there when my business failed.  You were there when we lost the house.  And, you’ve been right here—the whole time—by my side even as my health failed & I lay dying.” He paused briefly & asked, “You know what?” “What, dearest?” She asked as she wiped a tear from her eye.  “I think you’re bad luck” he said; and, then slipped back into a coma!

-Flawless Marriage Counseling!

I’m pretty confident that everyone enters into marriage longing for a partnership that remains strong & healthy! I hope that it doesn’t surprise you when I say that God’s Word provides us with the ONLY flawless counsel for building those healthy marriages; and, for training up godly children! If you’re a relatively new follower of Jesus, you may be surprised to find out how much the Bible has to say about marriage & sex & family! But, think about it! It was God who created marriage! And, it was God who created sex! He created the family, too! So, it really only makes sense that we would go to the SOURCE for wisdom & counsel in these areas!

-A Foundational Bible Text!

A foundational text on the subject of marriage, sex, and the family is 1 Corinthians 7:1-9. It’s incredibly practical; and, if you’ll commit to obeying the words of Scripture—rather, than listening to the foolish, so-called “wisdom” of the world—you’ll have that strong & happy marriage that everyone longs for.  It’s an intriguing passage! What the Apostle Paul says to the Church of Corinth—and, these are words inspired by God’s Holy Spirit—are completely out-of-step with the world’s wisdom and the societal norms for family & for human sexuality! So, choose who you’re going to listen to!

-Where Healthy Sex Happens!

If you just google “A Healthy Sex Life” you’ll get results like “10 Signs You Have A Healthy Sex Life”—but, not one sign is attached to marriage between a man & a woman! Your google search results will also include articles on sexual dysfunction & how to maintain an active sex life; but, again, with no reference to marriage! But, according to God, “Healthy Sex” ONLY happens in a marriage relationship between a man and a woman! Over & over, the Word of God warns us against the ramifications of sexual conduct outside of a marriage between a man and a woman! All other sexual activities are spiritually unhealthy because it is disobedience to God’s word! But, it can also prove to be physically & emotionally unhealthy! It has a trickle down effect, negatively impacting others downline! Next Week: We’ll get into 1 Cor. 7.

 

The Mysteries Of God!

-Why Doesn’t He Fix The World?

In my lifetime I’ve been in several conversations with individuals who had set themselves up as “judges” of God. “If God is all-powerful & knows everything,” they ask, “then why doesn’t He do something about all the bad stuff in the world?” Job’s picture could be placed next to that question! He serves as the epitome of unanswerable questions like that! How does God determine His will? Why does He seem to step into certain situations & not into others? Why does He permit wicked people, like ISIS, to continue ripping open pregnant women & beheading little children & killing people just for loving Jesus?

-Can You Fathom God?

The Book of Job seems to be an appropriate book for addressing the mysteries of God— “Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty? They are higher than the heavens — what can you do? They are deeper than the depths of the grave–what can you know? Their measure is longer than the earth and wider than the sea” Job 11. Scripture tells us that God’s paths are beyond our ability to trace out! So, what is an appropriate response, on our part, to God’s wisdom & knowledge? To His unsearchable & untraceable ways? The answer: HUMILITY! That is the only appropriate response! To humble ourselves before him & admit we haven’t got a clue! And, that He alone knows it all! And, He is under no obligation to share any more answers with us than what He has in His Word!

-Who Can Know God’s Mind?

We need to give God glory for His counsel— “For who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been His counselor? Or who has ever first given to Him, and has to be repaid?” Romans 11:34-35. Who has ever known the mind of God? Who can know what He’s thinking? So, who could ever offer God any useful counsel? But, still, we try telling God what He needs to do with His universe, don’t we? If you were God would you do things differently? If you say “YES” that’s exactly why the rest of us are glad you’re NOT God! And, you all ought to be equally glad that I’m not God, either! Ponder this thought— because God knows everything that’s knowable, that means He’s already considered your ideas & tossed them out as an unacceptable response to the situation! Right?

-The End From The Beginning!

Because you & I don’t know the end from the beginning, like He does, we really can’t offer Him any thoughts that He hasn’t already considered! “The secret things belong to the Lord our God…” Deut 29:29; “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways & My thoughts than your thoughts, says the Lord” Isaiah 55:9 . So, let us give God the glory He is due for His wisdom, knowledge & counsel! And, by faith, trust Him with all the things you don’t have answers for! I love how Tony Evans says it:  “Everything is either caused by God or allowed by God; and, there is no third category.” Paul concludes, “To Him be the glory forever” Romans 11:36. Let’s glory in God, His Son & the cross!

 

Is Your God Too Small?

-Are You Too Big?

40 some years ago, J.B. Phillips wrote, what turned into a Christian classic, Your God Is Too Small. It’s a great book! I highly recommend it! Phillips does a great job of capturing the struggle, that we humans have, of seeing how big God really is! We tend to see God as much smaller & less awesome than He is; and, we see ourselves as much bigger & more significant than we really are!

-Superman Don’t Need No Airplane!

I love the story about former heavy weight boxing champ, Muhammad Ali, who loved to boast, in jest, about being the greatest! It was part of his shtick & show! Once, while flying on a commercial flight, the stewardess told him to fasten his seatbelt just before takeoff. “Superman don’t need no seatbelt,” Ali replied; and, the stewardess shot back, “Superman don’t need no airplane, either.” That pretty much epitomizes the attitude the “health, wealth & prosperity FALSE gospel” has spawned here in the western church! The image of God has been distorted!

-He’s No “Genie In A Bottle”!

Much, of the Church, has turned God into a wimpy “Genie in the bottle” kind of God who grants OUR wishes; and, somehow NEEDS us to feel significant! Rather, than the self-sufficient, self-sustaining Sovereign God, that He is, who needs nothing & is the KING of kings & LORD of lords! I love how Paul addresses this subject in his letter to the Roman believers:  “Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and the knowledge of God! How unsearchable His judgments and untraceable His ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been His counselor? Or who has ever first given to Him, and has to be repaid? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever.  Amen” Romans 11:33-36.

-Glory In God’s Wisdom!

That’s another one of those rich texts, of Scripture, that magnifies & lifts up our Awesome God! Paul is like caught up in the wonder & the mystery of who He is! He seems to be promoting the underlying thought that good or bad, big or small, whatever comes our way, let us give God Glory for everything that happens in life! Notice, he challenges the church to give God Glory for His “…wisdom and knowledge…” Whatever comes, give God Glory because of His wisdom & knowledge. He knows what He’s doing!

-Is God Foolish?

There’s another great verse that Paul included, in his letter, to the Church of Corinth: “God’s foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God’s weakness is stronger than human strength” 1 Cor 1:25. Don’t you just love that? Mind you, Paul is NOT saying that God has a foolish side to Him. On the contrary, He’s pointing out how foolish we are when we think we’re really wise & smart. IF God had a foolish side—and, He DOESN’T—He would still be wiser than you and me! He’s “omniscient.” That means He knows everything! Anything that’s knowable, He already knows it; and, He’s known it for all eternity! He knows everything you & I have forgotten; but, He still knows it! And, He knows everything that you & I will never know! Only God knows why He allows the wickedness, in the world, to enjoy temporary victories! Trust His wisdom!

 

God’s Glory Over Our Justification!

-He Alone Gets Glory For Our Faith!

When the Apostle Paul wrote his letter to the Church of Ephesus, he made it clear, from the start, that God ALONE must receive the glory for anyone’s salvation! From the beginning of salvation, through our “justification”, until it’s completion at our “glorification”; and, everything in between during our “sanctification” in the present— ALL of it is God’s work for which He is to receive Glory! “Praise the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,” Paul began, “who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavens. For He chose us in Him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted through Jesus Christ for Himself, according to His favor and will, to the praise of His glorious grace that He favored us with in the Beloved” Ephesians 1:3-6.

-To The Praise Of His Glorious Grace!

That phrase, “…to the praise of His glorious grace…” is actually translated, “…to the praise of the GLORY of His grace…” in the NKJV. In other words, God is glorified through our “justification.” He is glorified AS He justifies us! It isn’t anything that we do! HE justifies us! HE saves us from the penalty of our sin! That’s what it means to be justified in God’s sight! Our sin legally condemns us to death! But, when Jesus became the substitutionary atonement on our behalf, God could LEGALLY remove the death penalty, we deserved, because Jesus died in our place! And, clearly, Paul intends for us to understand that our justification was God’s work alone!

-God Chose Us Before Creation!

No doubt drawing from Jesus’ words— “…You did not choose Me, but I chose you…”—Paul confirmed that, “…HE CHOSE us… BEFORE the foundation of the world…” v.4. Think of that! Let those words sink in! Feel the weight of that statement! BEFORE the world was created; BEFORE you were created, God had already CHOSEN you IF you’re a believer! “HE PREDESTINED us to be ADOPTED…” v.5. It’s because HE chose us & HE predestined us, to be saved BEFORE we were created, that all boasting or credit we might take, for our faith, is removed! One of the most significant aspects, of a marriage, is that from that day on a woman is called by a new name! Her name is changed because the groom loves her!

-Called By A New Name!

The groom loves her & invites her to take on a new identity as his wife! One of the most significant aspects of accepting Jesus, as Savior, is the fact that from that day on we’re called by a new name! Jesus loves us & invites us to take on a new identity! We’re no longer called  a “sinner”; but, a “saint”; His “bride”; His “church”! Throughout Scripture, there are many examples where God changed the names of His people— He changed Abram, meaning “high father”, to Abraham, meaning “father of a multitude of many nations”; He changed Sarai, meaning “argumentative”, to Sarah, meaning “princess”; He changed Simon, meaning “he has heard”, to Peter, meaning “the rock.” There are many more if you’ll look into it! When God justifies us He gives us a new name to signify a changed life; and, He does it all for His Glory!

 

The Fading Glory Of Creation!

-Don’t Accept A Cheap Substitute!

When we refuse to give God the glory He alone deserves, we exchange the glory of an immortal Creator for the glory of created things! In other words, we accept cheap substitutes! When we could have gloried in an eternal, immortal, all-powerful Creator, we glory instead in the FADING glory of a creation that groans & dies under the weight of sin’s curse! James wrote:  “Let the rich man glory in his humiliation, because as a flower of the field he will pass away. For no sooner has the sun risen with a burning heat than it withers the grass; its flower falls, and its beautiful appearance perishes. So the rich man also will fade away in his pursuits” James 1:9-11.

-Beauty Queens & Hip Replacements!

That means that beauty queens grow old & decrepit. It means that sports stars grow old; and, get hip & knee replacements.  So, if you value anything more than God, you’ve exchanged the “imperishable” for the “perishable.” You’ve traded the diamond for that rotten peach that’s been in the back of your fridge for the last 3 months! You’ve traded gold for a rusty bolt! In Paul’s letter to the Church of Rome, he also says that when you dismiss or deny God’s glory that you exchange the truth of God for the lies of sexual perversions— “…God delivered them over in the cravings of their hearts to sexual impurity, so that their bodies were degraded among themselves. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie…” Romans 1:24-25.

-God’s Not The Kill Joy In The Sky!

Listen, God is NOT the big “sex KILL JOY” in the sky! He’s NOT a PRUDE! He created sex! Contrary to what some people seem to think, sex wasn’t our idea! God created sex; and, the reason He restricted sexual activity to a HUSBAND & a WIFE is because He loves us! His way is the BEST way for us! All sexual activity—outside that which is between a HUSBAND & a WIFE— will always result in painful, negative experiences! Humanity keeps ignoring God’s glory when it comes to sexual conduct; so, God delivers them over to sexual impurity, Paul says. And, our society is bent on degrading their bodies because they’ve believed all the lies of sexual perversions! There’s a really important principle here!

-Living With Regret!

You can glory in the lies of sin & get some momentary pleasure out of it; but, the pleasure is soon gone & what remains is regret! Or, you can glory in the truth of God; and, gain happiness & joy that does not fade in this life! A joy that actually carries over into eternity! You can live without regrets now! Give God the glory due His name! Redirect any praise— that might come your way— to Him! Humble yourself before him! Admit that you’re NOT a self-made man or woman! You’re made in the image of God for His Glory! If you’re a follower of Jesus, His Spirit indwells you; and, it is He who is making you into the image of Christ.  Everything you have— Yes! Everything— comes from Him! Don’t take any credit for your accomplishments! That’s what unbelievers do. Stand with the Apostle Paul: “As for me, I will never boast about anything except the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ “ Galatians 6:14. Brag on the cross & Jesus’ work for our salvation!