A Distinctly Christ-Centered Home!

-It Starts With Communication!

(PART 1) I’m quite sure that everyone would agree that communication plays a huge part in family relationships! I heard of a man & wife, who had only a dog that they loved like a child. One day the wife headed out on a business trip; and, when she got to her destination she called home to check in with her husband. “How are things going?” she asked. His reply was shocking: “The dog’s dead.” “What,” she asked, “why would you just come right out and say it like that? That’s devastating! Couldn’t you have told me that news a little differently? I’m miles from home & you just blurt it out there, ‘the dog’s dead.’” “Well, I don’t know how else to say it,” he responded, “I mean he’s dead!” “Well,” she said, “you could have broke the news to me in stages.” “Like, what do you mean?” he asked. “Well, when I first called, you could have told me the dog fell off the roof; and, then when I check in later you might have said you had to take the dog to the animal hospital & he wasn’t doing well. The next day you might have told me to sit down & brace yourself; but, our darling dog has passed away! You could have done it like that so I could have handled it better.” “Ok, I get it,” he said, “I’m sorry! I’ll try & do better next time.” “Ok, thanks, honey” she said, “I just needed to clear that up! So, how is my mother?” There was a pause, “She’s on the roof!” While that story may or may not have an awful lot to do with a distinctly Christ-centered home, I thought it worth the chuckle it would generate.

-A Uniquely Distinct Home!

So, let me begin with this series of posts with the following statement—the life of a Christian husband & wife will be uniquely distinct from the marriages of the world! If you intend to follow Jesus, you need to settle that in your heart! The world will think us crazy; but, that’s the world’s wisdom & always remember: “The foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom” 1 Cor. 1:25. As long as we live by “the Book”, our world view will never be accepted by the unbelieving crowd. We need to be okay with that! Don’t be abrasive about it! Always be kind & respectful when sharing your position! Just know that your view will be rejected!

-Your Life As A Christian Wife!

According to the Holy Spirit, of God, who inspired Peter to write these words, your life as a Christian wife will be marked by a submission to your own husband. “In the same way, wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, even if some disobey the Christian message, they may be won over without a message by the way their wives live” 1 Peter 3:1.  Ladies, you’ll make no friends with the “Women’s Movement” if submission marks your relationship with your husband; but, you will be a friend of God! That word “submit”—in the original Greek language—means to submit “voluntarily” to your husbands lead. And, notice how significant that could play in an unbelieving husband’s life. If your husband is disobedient to God, God may use YOUR obedience to win your husband over to the Lord! (PART II Next Week)

 

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Complementary Love & Submission!

-It’s Not About Inequality!

In our culture we tend to equate any kind of “submission” to another person as a sign of “inequality.” That’s unfortunate because it simply isn’t true! All of us submit to our boss at work; not, because of inequality; but, because of order! God designed order into every area of His world; including, the home! Jesus, Himself, submitted to that order in the home:  “And He (Jesus) went down with them (his parents) and came to Nazareth and was submissive to them” Luke 2:51.  I certainly hope that doesn’t mean that Jesus, the 2nd member of the Triune Godhead, was somehow BENEATH His human parents!

-Jesus Submitted To The Father!

And, what of Jesus’ submission to the Father within the Triune Godhead? He is just as much “GOD” as the Father and the Spirit. But, He voluntarily gave in to the Father’s lead:  “Make your own attitude that of Christ Jesus, who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God as something to be used for His own advantage. Instead He emptied Himself by assuming the form of a slave, taking on the likeness of men. And when He had come as a man in His external form, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death—even to death on a cross” Phil. 2:5-8. Did you see that? He was EQUAL with God, the Father; but, He didn’t use that to His own advantage! Rather, He humbled Himself and voluntarily became obedient to the Father!

-Wives Looking Like Jesus!

Wives—nothing you do, within the structure of your home, makes you look more like Jesus, than when you VOLUNTARILY give up control to your husband! Not because you’re incapable! In fact, I’ve counseled many marriages in which the WIFE was clearly the more “CAPABLE” leader; but, when she gave that up voluntarily it changed the entire dynamics of their home. By doing so, she empowered her husband to lead and love; and, she “imaged” Jesus for her children. Ladies, that’s how you complement your husband according to God’s design for the home! And, men, you complement your wife’s voluntary submission by your LOVE for her.  “HUSBANDS, LOVE your wives…” Colossians 3:19.

-A Voluntary, Sacrificial Love!

The context, of this Colossians 3 passage, shows that the wife’s submission is prompted by a husband who shows her unselfish love. In no way does the Scripture imply that the husband is to DEMAND submission from his wife! It’s impossible to draw that meaning from this text. The relationships are understood to be reciprocal. He gains the voluntary submission of his wife as he loves her & she enjoys more of his love as she voluntarily submits to him! That word translated “love” is “agape” in the original language; and, it’s interesting that “agape” love is a “voluntary, sacrificial kind of love.” Her submission is to be voluntary & his love his to be given voluntarily. It’s not governed by feelings! It’s a love that looks out for her best interests, regardless! A love that refuses to turn “bitter” as Paul points out in the rest of v.19.

 

When Good Sex Goes Bad!

-When It Happens Outside Marriage!

According to God—who, by the way, CREATED sex—healthy sex only happens in a marriage between a man & a woman! The Word of God warns us against the ramifications of sexual conduct outside the safety of marriage between a man and a woman! All other sexual activities are spiritually unhealthy because it’s disobedience to God and His Word. But, it can also prove to be physically and emotionally unhealthy! And, the effects tend to have a trickle down effect. It can negatively impact your family & your children downline.

-Messing Up People’s Lives!

When your sex life doesn’t comply with Scripture, you can mess up a lot of people’s lives! One more consideration for those of you who think you’ve already messed up too badly! That you’re hopeless! Maybe you grew up in a worldly environment & were never even taught these Biblical truths. Or, maybe you grew up hearing them; but, you thought you were smart enough to beat “the system”; so, you played around with sex & you’re paying the price for it now! Well, thanks to Jesus’ work on the cross, you’re not beyond repair!

-Good News For Those Who Messed Up!

The Gospel is good news to every sinner, regardless the sin! We have a God who makes beauty from ashes! There is forgiveness & restoration through the cross! So, don’t hide behind your sin any longer! Confess it so you can be healed (James 5:16). And, from this day forward, plant your feet on the firm foundation of God’s Word, when it comes to your sex life! God’s Word alone provides us the only flawless counsel for building healthy marriages. In the book of 1 Corinthians, the Apostle Paul shares several points, about sexuality, as God directs us:  “It is good for a man not to have relations with a woman. But because sexual immorality is so common, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband….I say the following as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all people were just like me. But each has his own gift from God, one person in this way and another in that way. I say to the unmarried and to widows: It is good for them if they remain as I am” 1 Corinthians 7:1, 6-8.

-Is Celibacy A Gift?

What Paul is encouraging here is “celibacy.” He seems to indicate that “celibacy” is God’s gift for some individuals! So, if you can’t imagine being celibate, that probably means that you don’t have that gift! I purposely used the word celibacy, instead of “singleness”—because celibacy more accurately defines what Paul is describing here—celibacy is abstaining from ALL sexual relations! Whereas, in our culture, “singleness” is often preferred because there are no sexual attachments or boundaries—it’s “Sex In The City!” It’s friends with “benefits.” So, being “single” doesn’t necessarily express what Paul is thinking! When he says, “It is good for a man not to have relations with a woman” (v.1) he’s using it as a euphemism for “sexual intercourse”; and, the context of v.2 bears that out. So, celibacy can be a good & honorable gift from God!

 

Worship Rejects All Competing Loves!

-It Impacts Your Life Like That!

According to the Apostle Paul’s urging,  to the Church of Rome,  when your worship is genuine it will impact your life, in such a dynamic way, that God will use it to produce perpetual change in you— “…I urge you to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God. This is your spiritual worship…” Romans 12:1.  As we worship God, He is redeeming our lives—as we intentionally present them to Him—to “remake” them into the image for which we were created before sin ruined it all! That’s why Paul wrote the Church of Corinth, “Don’t you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought at a price. Therefore glorify God in your body” 1 Corinthians 6:19,20.

-You’re Not Your Own!

Don’t you know, Paul asked, that if you’ve accepted Jesus, as your Savior, that you’re NOT your own! He BOUGHT you—that word carries the idea of “redemption.” He redeemed you! He reclaimed you! He’s in the process of restoring you by sanctification! So, we must intentionally present our bodies to Him as a “living sacrifice” to glorify God with our bodies! But, there’s a 2nd point, that Paul ties to our worship, in the next verse—“Do not be conformed to this age”; or, this “world” as some translations render it! (Romans 12:2) I like how the Philips Translation puts it—“Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mold…

-Only 2 World Views!

In other words, “worshiping” God involves an intentional rejection of the world’s demand to conform! There are really only 2 “world views” or philosophies. There is the philosophy of the world that is self-centered, self-pleasing, and self-indulgent! It’s promoted in advertising, books, movies, video games and most social media. It’s constantly pinching us & squeezing us into it’s mold—“If you don’t conform, you’re out of touch,” the world says!  The opposing “world view” submits to Creator God & His word! Paul continues, “…be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.” Worship transforms & renews your mind!

-Intentional Transformation!

Genuine worship includes an “intentional transformation” of the mind to think like God thinks—those thoughts that are “…good, pleasing, and perfect…” and align with God’s will! What a contrast, Paul presents, between being conformed & pressed into the world’s mold; or, being transformed with a renewed mind—all within the “context” of worship! Worship is way bigger then singing songs to Jesus for 20 minutes on a Sunday morning.  This passage paints a picture, of worship, that’s all about God doing a work in us! As we humble ourselves, in brokenness, before Him; and, intentionally offer our bodies back to Him, He begins to change us in ways that make us more & more usable for His Kingdom’s purposes! He is re-making us to be what we were meant to be; and, His Spirit works with our spirit by transforming our minds!

 

True Generosity Serves Others!

-It’s Not Just About Money!

We typically think of “generosity” in financial terms, don’t we? But, in God’s economy, generosity is shown in more than financial ways! In the book of Proverbs, the Spirit of God inspired King Solomon to include these words:  “A generous person will be enriched, and the one who gives a drink of water will receive water” Proverbs 11:25.  God intends for us to understand generosity as being about more than our finances! It’s not just about our money! According to this Proverb, God also measures generosity in the ways we serve others. He measures generosity by our willingness to minister & help others.

-Don’t Throw Money At It!

In the world, there’s a tendency to just throw money at a need. Rather than getting their hands dirty, the person who has the financial means would rather gift someone or an organization. Unfortunately, that same attitude can often be found in the church too! Many would rather “gift” it than get dirty through service or ministry to others! But, that’s NOT God’s economy! The Message paraphrases Proverbs 11:25 like this:  “The one who blesses others is abundantly blessed; those who help others are helped.” God measures our generosity by our willingness to serve & by our willingness to enrich the lives of others by ministering to them. By offering something, Solomon says, as simple as a glass of water.

-It’s Being “Others Focused”!

It’s that same principle, that Jesus taught,  of being “others focused.” Unfortunately, it’s typical, in our American church culture, to look for a church that serves “me”! To look for a church that serves “my kids”! That’s the mindset of a “consumer,” isn’t it? And, it’s a way of thinking that is foreign to Scripture & to the church, in other parts of the world, where they look for a place with needs so they can serve! Faith’s way of serving is to look for needs and meet them! Faith’s way of serving actually prays that God’s Spirit will open eyes to those needs & open hearts to actually meet them! As with your finances, don’t “calculate’ how God might move others to serve you if you serve them! That’s serving out of GREED! And, just like God will not bless a greedy giver financially, He’ll not bless a greedy server either! He gave to us in love & we must give the same!

-Serve Recklessly!

The principle, in Scripture, is kind of like this—just serve & minister to the needs of others with reckless abandon! By faith, believe that God will keep His Word! Believe that, whether it’s by sacrificial giving or service, that God is going to reward you.  You might be rewarded in this life! Or, your reward might be received in heaven! At the same time, though we know the reward is coming, don’t give to get!  Just be generous, in faith, that God will take care of you! When we give, from a generous heart, it truly costs you nothing! You lose nothing in the exchange! You gain! You get richer the more you give! It’s counter cultural! Jesus said: “Whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life BECAUSE OF ME will FIND IT

What Are Your Attachments?

-Do You Identify With Jesus?

My sinful life was the OLD me! But, that’s no longer who I am. Sin has no power to rule over me anymore than it had power over Jesus. In His resurrection, Jesus left the tomb! And, so should we! We’re no longer “dead” if we’re “in Christ.” We’ve been made “new”; or, ALIVE in Him. We’re no longer a dweller among the tombs! Do you know who you are? Do you identify with Jesus? Is He your Lord & Master as well as your Savior? The Apostle Paul says, “…if you have been raised with the Messiah, seek what is above, where the Messiah is, seated at the right hand of God” Colossians 3:1. “Seek what is above,” he says! That’s an imperative! He’s commanding the Colossian believers to be SEEKERS of something—this has everything to do with your “heart” or your “affections.”

-To What Are You Attached To Here?

Your ability to live, in your identity, in Christ—and, to defeat sin—has to do with your “ATTACHMENTS”! What are you ATTACHED to here? Where are you focused? If your heart & your affections & your attachments are in this world, you won’t be very effective purging sin from your life. Your spiritual growth & sanctification will be stunted; and, the weeds, of SIN, will grow out of control in your life. Look at Paul’s words again: “…if (or SINCE) you’ve been raised with the MESSIAH, SEEK WHAT is ABOVE, where the MESSIAH is…” Set your heart & your affections on Jesus! He’s the TREASURE! None of the created stuff, that so easily turn into idols, will last—one day it’ll all burn up & pass away!

-What Spurs Us Toward Growth?

Your spiritual growth has a direct correlation to how highly & how often you think of God; and, how little you think of yourself! “Set your minds on what is above, not on what is on the earth,” Paul says in the next verse (Col. 3:2). Your spiritual growth & sanctification depends on what you “…set your minds…” Your ability to be killing the weeds, of sin, is dependent on your thought life—the things you dwell on; and, think about. To mature spiritually, you have to see everything against the backdrop of ETERNITY; not, this mortal world. We can no longer think like we did when we were still “dead in sin”; when, we lived like this world was the only thing that mattered! He specifically tells us not to set our mind on EARTH!

-Where Is Your Citizenship?

It’s so easy to get swept up in the nationalism & the politics & the drama of our nation! It’s so easy to “set our mind” & our conversation on those things, isn’t it? But, that’s not who we are! We can no longer self-identify as an “American Christian”—that moniker says we are an “American” 1st and a “Christian” 2nd. NO! “Our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ,” Paul wrote the Church of Philippi. The Apostle Peter agreed! He called life, on planet earth, a “temporary residence.” Don’t make country an IDOL! We belong to HEAVEN—we’re heaven’s AMBASSADORS! As God’s ambassadors, our sole purpose for remaining on this planet is to “reconcile” the lost with the Father!

What Fruit Does Your Life Produce?

-Your Happiness Depends On It!

Your happiness is contingent on the kind of “fruit” that your life produces! That’s what the writer of Psalm 1 tells us. In vs. 1-2 he says, “How happy is the man who does not follow the advice of the wicked or take the path of sinners or join a group of mockers! Instead, his delight is in the Lord’s instruction, and he meditates on it day and night.” Don’t be surprised that God wants you to be HAPPY! But, He qualifies what it means to be “HAPPY”! It’s not the “happiness”, of this world, that’s generally tangled up in sinful conduct; and, while it may provide momentary pleasure, leaves you empty and facing lingering painful consequences! The happiness that results from delighting “…in the Lord’s instruction…” leaves no “bad aftertaste”; and, culminates in a fruitful life that is eternal in duration!

-Every Life Bears Fruit!

In v.3, the writer says that the person who rejects the advice of the world & delights in God’s Word & meditates on it day and night, “…is like a tree planted beside streams of water that bears its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.” Every life bears fruit! Your life bears fruit! My life bears fruit! The Psalmist points to 2 different kinds of people who live their lives in 2 different ways; and, who bear 2 totally different types of fruit. The Apostle Paul uses similar language, in his letter to the Church of Galatia, when he says that the life lived in Christ produces the “fruit of the Spirit” like “…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness & self-control”; but, the fruit produced by “the flesh” is “… sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies and things like these.” (Galatians 5) Choose wisely who you listen to!

-Contrasting “World Views”!

The writer, of this Psalm, concludes, in v.5-6, with the FINAL END of the contrasting “world views”—“… the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous; for the LORD knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish.” In this life, the way of the righteous & the way of the wicked may appear to run parallel. In fact, the way of the wicked often looks pleasant & fun! But, a Day of Judgment is coming, the writer says!

-A Day Of Reckoning!

There is coming a day of reckoning; when, those who took their advice & counsel from God’s Word; and, delighted in it; and, meditated on it, will be gathered into a glorious congregation around the throne of God, in eternal HAPPINESS! While, the wicked will face the Great Judge, of all the earth, who will give them exactly what they always wanted—an eternity without God! The Lord promises to watch over you if the advice you follow & the things you take delight in & the content of your meditation bear the fruit of God’s Holy Spirit! Are these the things you delight in? If not, you need help! You need to pray for Holy Spirit help; and, you need to make yourself accountable to someone; or, a group, who will encourage you! Only in the Truth, of God’s Word, will you find real, genuine, eternal HAPPINESS; and, a relationship with God!